Wednesday, October 17, 2012

The One Year Mark

Ryan and I and the windmills

Tomorrow, on October 18th, we hit the one year mark living abroad. Can you believe it? The expression "time flies" holds true. How the past year has flown and there is much for me to digest and reflect on. I remember the day well back in January 2011 when Ryan asked what I thought about moving to The Netherlands for a few years. He took me out to dinner to discuss what could be one of the biggest decisions we'd made in our then 9 years together. Without much hesitation, I responded positively thinking of what an amazing experience this would be, and, if we could truly make this happen, how privileged we'd be to live in another part of the world, even for just a little while. I really surprised myself. After all, I am not one to step far out of my comfort zone. I traded in my fear for something new and unknown and have been richly rewarded because of it.

Reflecting over the past year, I know that much has happened. I have grown in many different ways, sometimes without fully being aware, and I have learned a great deal about myself. When I left Seattle, my worst fear was that I would not be able to make new friends. Luckily my fears never came to fruition. I have met some amazing and wonderful people since moving to Holland. Many are expats just like ourselves coming from all parts of the globe, but we've also made a few Dutch friends(including my new Dutch BFF - she knows who she is). They have been my lifeboats in sometimes choppy waters.

Remarkably, I found work quickly and in an international setting which has broadened my horizons and enhanced my ability to understand other cultures and beliefs. I, too, have had the opportunity to write for the English speaking newspaper in The Hague which has heightened my skills and my love for writing has been rekindled, and perhaps one day I will be able to call myself an author! I cannot speak as highly of my Dutch language abilities, however. It's a tough language, let's be honest, but Ryan just loves demonstrating the new phrases and words he learns. He is definitely a natural!

Living away from family and friends is never easy. In fact, there are days when my mind daydreams about being back home in beautiful, oh so familiar Seattle. My mom and I talk every Sunday evening (my time zone) and she has often told me that there is a reason I am over here and not to forget that or let the experience slip away. It will someday come to an end and I will back in the U.S. I must live every day as best I can with open arms with what God gives!

I have almost finished reading a lovely little gem titled Gift from the Sea by Anne Morrow Lindbergh. She was the wife of Charles Lindbergh, the first man to make a non-stop solo flight from New York across the Atlantic ocean. I have read this book slowly, savouring the small seeds of wisdom she imparts. Anne writes about the beach and the sea, intertwining it with the every day experiences of life (a perfect summer selection). Amidst the language of the tides and seashells, I have found what she describes very profound.
"One never knows what chance treasures these easy unconscious rollers may toss up, on the smooth white sand of the conscious mind; what perfectly rounded stone, what rare shell from the ocean floor. Perhaps a channelled whelk, a moon shell, or even an argonaut. But it must not be sought for or- heaven for bid!-dug for. No, no dredging of the sea-bottom here. That would defeat one's purpose. The sea does not reward those who are too anxious, too greedy, or too impatient. To dig for treasures shows not only impatience and greed, but lack of faith. Patience, patience, patience, is what the sea teaches. Patience and faith. One should lie empty, open, choiceless as a beach - waiting for a gift from the sea."
Beautifully written and amazingly true. If I ever doubt the life and the adventures I have been given, I am losing out on what I need to be taught. I should not be anxious or impatient, but lie open as an endless beach because it is here where God himself will give me what is most sought after in my heart - peace, joy and the love he has burned in my heart for others. Sometimes, it is being taken out of one's comfort zone to come to this deep and profound understanding.

I have never thought of myself as very brave. Yet on this first anniversary of living far from those we love and where I call home, I think I am brave. I have taken that leap of faith as Kierkegaard spoke of and trust that everything we encounter has a reason behind it and will someday be fully understood. We do not know how long we'll live in Holland (I know my mom is counting down the days) but for now, the outstretched journey ahead is not so daunting. It has been a good year with much discovery. I look forward to all that comes our way in the times ahead; To exploring new places, being open to new sands of the mind and to the abundance of which live brings!

As Frank Sinatra's famous song goes, "The Best is Yet to Come!"

Love always. XOXO,